Skip to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.
Kings Island Central Forums

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.
Reviews of Phantom Theater: Opening Nightmare

Cedar Fair's Expansion of PKI Parking Lot Vending Runs Into a Snag

deb
in Kings Island

Featured Replies

Like all amusement park chains, Cedar Fair is always on the lookout for a new profit center, whether it's on-ride pictures, premium parking, or paid line-jumping. Earlier this season, they thought they had a sure winner at Kings Island, one that might even make up for the bad press related to the loop removal on Son of Beast: Heroin sales in the parking lot.

"It'd be perfect for calming patrons down before they come in," said park spokesman Roger Machina. "And you haven't seen our fireworks displays until you've seen them on crank. Or so I'm told. I certainly don't know." So the park started its new project, retrofitting a Dippin' Dots cart, now called the "Rolling Smack Shack." Business was good, until unfortunately a NASCAR truck racer was arrested for possession of illegal substances.

"Turns out it's illegal," said Machina, shaking his head. "We had no idea. And we had huge future plans, including a celebrity tie-in, where we were in talks with Courtney Love to make the cart 'Kurt Cobain's Rolling Smack Shack.'"

Plans to sell actual handguns at the "Shoot 'Em Up" midway game have also been put on hold.

--GP

LINK

I found this, and found it HILARIOUS! Really didn't know where to put it...

deb

  • Quote

    Absolutely Reliable is a joke web site. It's 100% fictional.

    Heck, Roger Machina isn't even a real person to my knowledge. The park's spokespeople are Don Helbig and Craig Ross.

  • Quote
    • Author

    I knew that, that's why I posted that it was a bad joke... I thought everyone else MIGHT find it amusing. It stemmed from the nascar driver...

    *shrug*

    deb

  • Quote

    They also have an article about Face/Off's apparent extended downtime. Link

    I wonder when they'll reveal who blew up the limosine and is responsible for the (apparent) death of Mr. McMahon!!! :P

  • Quote

    ^ It was his wife linda mcmahon they gave the storyline away 3 weeks ago..you can read it at Wrestlezone.com but be warned you'll have to look for it and that site has many pop-ups!...wait Nascar truck driver? dontcha mean NASTRUCK..either way that guy was a moron for going to KI with drugs on him.

  • Quote

    That was amazing.

    This part takes the cake...

    "Turns out it's illegal," said Machina, shaking his head.
  • Quote

    • Join the conversation

    You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
    Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

    Guest
    Reply to this topic...
    Go to topic listing

    Recently Browsing 0

    • No registered users viewing this page.
    Background Picker

    Account

    Navigation

    Search

    Search

    Configure browser push notifications
    Chrome (Android)
    1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
    2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
    3. Adjust your preference.
    Chrome (Desktop)
    1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
    2. Select Site settings.
    3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.